The famous Hidden Valley Ranch, where salad dressing flows like lava from beautiful, multicolored volcanoes of Italian, Balsamic, French, Raspberry Vinaigrette, and that famous zesty white stuff, has been found through a crawl space of a Rue21 dressing room in
TULSA, OK – Darla Skidder recounted an audacious discovery after entering her office bathroom Wednesday mid-morning; holding the door for her exiting co-worker, Cheryl. “I knew right then that Cheryl must’ve just gotten up from one of the toilet seats…but which one?”
COLUMBIA, SC – “Damnit–WHERE’S THE REMOTE?!” Tony Schligia (42) hollers to his family, standing 6′ 1″, 270lb in a sleeveless undershirt and basketball shorts in the living room of his modest ranch home.
Like every morning, Danielle really wanted to start today off by not shower crying, but accidentally opened social media, and definitely needed a shower cry.
WICHITA, KS – With Thanksgiving only 22 days away, your overly-religious Aunt awoke from her sleep this morning filled with inspiration — to draft the family prayer for Thanksgiving.
“The pressure to perform well for the Lord can be very intimidating. With the exception of Christmas, this is the one chance I have each year to
United States – Following a long month of terrifying news cycles, including an investigation into Supreme Court Associate Justice Brett Kavanaugh’s sexual assault allegations, a warning from scientists illustrating the last twelve good years left before the Earth boils, and
(LOS ANGELES – CA) At a Halloween party at his buddy Josh’s girlfriend’s house, Quinn couldn’t help but feel a little uneasy surrounded by devils, demons, and sexy nurses. Were they really just people in costume, or were they
MAUI, HAWAII- @ZenSteelOats69 uploaded a beautiful photo of his zen this morning, with a peaceful reminder to explore the beautiful curves of the Earth. He wants his Instagram followers to take in the bulging aura that yoga has provided him, and meditate on the happy trail to enlightenment that he is on.
CHICAGO, IL – When local homeless man, Tom [just Tom], stopped inside the North/Clybourne Apple store to see what he could steal, he discovered what many people around the world saw last month: the new iPhone XS, and its price tag.
Stare deeply into the endless woven thread. Allow yourself to sink into the soft, swirling fabric. Let the infinite scarf absorb your worries, as you wrap your head around the things you cannot change and mistakes you cannot fix.
PRINCETON, NJ – A new study from Princeton University finds that out of 100 men caught staring at a woman’s cleavage and told, “my eyes are up here,” 99.6 percent of them already knew that.
To their complete outrage, hundreds of young men have found that their 8 inch long penises, when measured with the new iPhone “Measure” app, are being displayed as just 5 1/2 inches.
The dangerous levels of misogyny made the air difficult to breathe, but the brave reporters pressed on, much to Trump’s protests.
(Waco, TX) Guerrilla Riders National President Jeremy Oldman, 64, has decreed that the long tradition of making fun of yogies must come to an end, after an amazing free session at Moonrise Yoga that left his back feeling wonderful.
The unpublished professor, Dr. Peter Amateuris, addressed his Professional Practices of Published Novelists class with confidence as he made up all kinds of nonsense about what the “industry” is looking for.